Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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