I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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