Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
