actually, I'm a sock model
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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