I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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