There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
