Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
