Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize