You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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