Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Randomize
