i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
We just shotgunned beers for America
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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