Define "chronic" masturbator.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I am one with the molecules
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize