normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Randomize
