Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Randomize