I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
