Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize