We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
