no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Randomize