Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize
