my mouth tastes like poor choices
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i love accidental penises.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
whose parrot is this?
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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