That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Randomize
