Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize