I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
