Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
