thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
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