I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
