how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
