meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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