Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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