Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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