I hate all girls vehemently.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I look better un-naked...
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
where are my eyebrows?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
