I can feel you judging me through the phone.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Randomize
