your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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