Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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