I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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