Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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