I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Randomize
