these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
