I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
