physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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