But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
