would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
