She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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