Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
