she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
