hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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