I think my vagina is haunted
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
