someone threw a dead crab at me
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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