Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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