Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
