On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Randomize
